So here I am again, almost at the very end of the day, staying up way past my bedtime because of this (self-imposed) blog-post-every-day deadline. It is amazing to me how quickly I fall into the work habits I've had since junior high. You know, piddling around all day, "thinking" about my assignment, looking up books and articles for "research," writing a paragraph or two, then erasing them (now I just hit backspace until the false start disappears), walking away, doing a few other things that absolutely do not have to be done today, then finally, when I can't wait any longer, I sit down and write, having created the pressure I seem to need to get something on paper.
That's just messed up. I have long wondered if I can justify all of this by claiming that my best work is actually produced in a sleep-deprived semi-stupor. Nah! We all know it's really just a lack of discipline.
And speaking of that, I am amazed at how much time evaporates when I am sitting in front of a computer. I take my laptop to work at the post office, because I keep thinking I will have time to write. And I do, though now, as the holidays approach, work has gotten a lot busier. I actually came home today and told Mike that all I'd accomplished at work today was, you know, work. But really, if I used my time wisely, like my fourth grade teacher, Mrs. Berrier (and my fifth grade teacher Mrs. Koch, and my sixth grade teacher Mrs. Holliday, and my seventh grade English teacher, Mrs. Little-- I think you get the idea...) kept telling me I should, I could get a lot of work done in the moments between postal customers.
Part of the problem is that I don't even have to get up to wander away from my work. Just click on a different screen. Oh! Look at everything new on Face book in the last twenty minutes. Oh! Look at all the cool stuff on Etsy since I checked this morning. Oh! Look, new e-mails-- can't let that in-box fill up. Now, I've discovered the joys of wasting time on, I mean listening to, Spotify, the streaming radio thingy. I listened to a hundred songs today. Really? Am I twelve? Now I'm not even getting my spices alphabetized or my underwear drawer organized while I avoid writing. I've reached a new bottom level of non-productivity. At least I've achieved something, I guess.
Brainstorm! Get this new strategy: I'm going to plan to do surf the internet for hours, answer e-mails and listen to streaming radio. All by the end of the day, so that there's some time pressure, too. I think I'll find myself wandering away from that stuff to write in no time. I mean, as long as I'm not doing what I'm supposed to be doing, I can get a lot done.
I'll let you know how this works out, as soon as I get around to trying it.